Sunday, October 31, 2010

Just About the Time...

Why is it so hard to give things up to God?! It seems like just about the time I lay something down at the feet of God, I try to pick it back up again. I don't want to do that anymore! I want God to take complete control of my life... all areas of it! I say that, but then again, I always have that frame of mind that if I want something, I need to go for it and get it done myself. I would just like, for once, to be able to fully accept that God is in control. Even when I think I am, he still is. It's so difficult.

Why am I on this earth and single and going to Disney in the spring? Like, what is my purpose? What am I supposed to do? While everyone else is getting married and living their happy little couple lives, I stand watching as a bridesmaid and best friend to all of these. What is my purpose that I seem to be missing out on?

No. I'm not ready to get married, but a date would be nice. I do love my life. I have a great family and great friends and a great God who make my life worth living, but why is it that I have these desires for a relationship within me? It feels like a tease! I wish it were so cut and dry, but I guess this is something that I'll have to really work at laying down at his feet. I won't know my purpose and the reason for all of this until I do.

Patiently (or unpatiently) waiting, 
Katelyn

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Biology? Really?

I'm having to teach 7th and 8th grade science for my middle school placement in student teaching. I was nervous about it. When I got there today, my teacher was super nice! BUT... 7th grade science is apparently 80% biology. BARF!!!

I hate biology.

Seriously? I couldn't get a math placement? Really?

I'm almost done.

And it doesn't help that I miss my high schoolers SOOOOO much from MLK.

Almost there,
Katelyn

Friday, October 1, 2010

A Bittersweet Goodbye

Today was my last day at my MLK placement. I wasn't quite sure what to expect emotion-wise. I was worried I would cry my eyes out, but also worried that my excitement to get a new teacher would overshadow my sadness of leaving my kids. I love those kids so much. I developed such close relationships with some of them. I have so many great memories from that short 7 weeks. It really makes me sad that I may never see them ever again. I pray that I've left an impact on them. I tried so hard to get to know all of them, but it's hard when you have 108 kids in your classes. I just know that they way they interacted with me and showed their love and kindness towards me most definitely left an imprint on my heart.

5th period was my favorite. I tried so hard not to have a favorite class, but they were so awesome. I mean, there were kids in other classes that were great and I loved being around, but there was something about that one class. I was sad to leave them. Today in 5th period, they kept telling me how they wanted me to teach them on my last day. They also kept telling me that they didn't want me to leave and how much they were going to miss me. One girl even made the whole class cupcakes since I was leaving. Another girl brought snacks for the class. One guy in the class said we shouldn't be celebrating since I'm leaving. It was more like a funeral. That made me giggle, but also warmed my heart. They loved me and I was only there for 7 weeks. It's crazy how close you can grow to someone in such a short period of time. So at the end of class, the kids all came up and gave me hugs. They kept saying they would miss me and that I needed to come back and visit. I will admit, I cried.

In that last 5 minutes of class, I realized how much of an impact I'd had on them. Along with that, when I was tutoring two girls yesterday, they told me they didn't know how they were going to pass physics without me. Not only did I show love and compassion for them, but those two girls gave me confidence that maybe I had taught them even just a little bit about physics, something I was worried I wouldn't be good at (crazy, but true). I was changed during this placement. God really showed me how much of an impact students can have on me. He also showed me how being a patient kind teacher can have an impact on students. I was worried that I would be too strict or that everyone would hate me, but they have led me to think that maybe I did something right. I am so thankful that I got to be at MLK with those kids. I'm sad to leave, but I know God will continue to bless me and my student teaching experience.

Loving what I do,
Katelyn